justmethatsall's soup

turing-tested:

scatterbrainedadventurelog:

turing-tested:

do NOT offer me a big spoon if you see me with a small one. i know what im fuckin doing

can i offer a smaller spoon?

absolutely! finally, someone with some sense around here

kutners-memory:

greenglowsgold:

jasper-rolls:

every time i fuck up plugging in the USB to charge my iphone and scratch it against the underside of the phone i think about that scene at the start of sherlock where sherlock assumes that john watson’s sister is an alcoholic because of the scratches around the charging port of the iphone she gave to him as a gift and i think to myself “man sherlock is a fucking idiot”

#god if I could meet Sherlock holmes I would have a field day preparing my Look to throw him off#watch me wear an engagement ring for a week before hand and take it off and wear one of my mom’s blouses that has the shoulder all crunched#from years of violin playing and a pair of brand new matching socks and carry a brand new copy of a book i’ve read 20 times#and spill some coffee on my shoes and cuddle my neighbor’s cats so i have different cat fur on me#my dream is to throw off a sherlock holmes type with pure petty bs 

@hedgiwithapen that is a very specific and well thought-out fantasy

lol

hustlerose:

j0ules:

hustlerose:

hustlerose:

ouch i think i broke my vagina bones 

OH SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

we can just post whatever we want on this site and no one will question it huh

yes

unicornfan:

catbountry:

yes-it-means-i-am-bread:

does anyone remember law4kids

like this kids’ website that had these shitty webcomics and animations telling them all about DA LAW

i mean this shit was hilarious even by itself

BUT THEN PEOPLE STARTED MAKING PARODIES

AND THEY JUST KEPT COMING

This one was always my favorite:

please be careful with these, they’re antiques

fantasticbeastsandheretofindthem:

njadakasrage:

Erik and T’Challa seeing each other in the Ancestral Plane

@lesbuchanan this post straight up murdered me

wombatking:

newtgeiszler:

jesterofthetraveler:

I agree john mulaney is probably an immortal akin to beings such as keanu reeves and jeff goldblum but he’s like a new born baby immortal who is looking at the long long expanse of a lifetime he has in front of him and is already tired

jeff golblum is thousands of years old and loving it. john mulaney was born in 1901 and ever since 1924 it’s gone downhill for him

So to be clear, the immortal timeline seems to be:

John Mulaney - early 20th century

Eric Andre - Probably 17th century or so.

Taika Waititi - Elizabethan age, probably hung out with Shakespeare

Keanu Reeves - We think sometime around Alexander the Great, but he seems to have just sprung up fully formed.

Jeff Goldblum - 100% Biblical times, may or may not be King Solomon.

Tommy Wiseau - Indeterminate, may be the first Homo Sapiens.